O-Ringen / Academy and facing with a memory; JWOC 2012

It all started with a speed up Copenhagen tour. (All city in 5 hours. A boat tour included.) 

O-Ringen; It's the best place an orienteer can live, to me. Days before its finish, we were hoping that, there would be some kind of mix up with the results and they would organize the whole competition from the beginning (no offense. :) ). Unfortunately(!), everything were perfect, as always.

O-Ringen Academy; Best people that you can spend a wonderful orienteering week together. Academy is like the best team ever, even though you have just met with most of the people. It's a small step (not just one step, but it's just the way that saying goes..) for you, but a big one for developing the country you're willing to. O-Ringen is alone a life changing event, for an orienteer; especially who's coming from a small country in sense of orienteering, but combined with Academy experience, it's probably a dream come true for anyone.

Thank you so much to you all, for the unbelievable 10 days. :)

I'm not going into the details of what happened in Academy, it's not a big secret, but I like to keep somethings to myself. :P (Just kidding, it's a little long story to mention every detail in a blog. And every detail is important, so it's not possible to pick up the important ones.)

What about O-Ringen itself?

You should sometimes listen to your instincts. Especially if there's someone else, who also tells you to think about it one more time. My instincts were screaming crazily that, D21L was such a bad idea, without training and not a single map in my hand for months. But I some how manage to make myself believe that, I can manage a 8,5 course, over 4 days. My points were; 

1- I've already finished a L course in O-Ringen (D20L 2012), and it was 2 years ago, I'm so much better than that now. (I'm not, not without proper training.)

2- There're 2 days of rest after the second day. (That's not even something you can use to convince yourself to such craziness, if you're clever enough.)

What happened is; I've quieted the course on second day, and change my category to a lot more easier one (Open 5) for the last two stages. I can't say that the only reason behind this decision was that, I was too tired, or not thinking that capable of doing it. I was already prepared to be running 3 hours courses. Being tired is not even an excuse, if you're ready for that. What I wasn't expecting was the wounds on my ankles, after first stage. (Do not even consider using athletic taping, without under-wrap. Don't do it at all, you'll better of without it.) I was too tired of the pain, when I arrived at the 6th control, I decided to cut the course a little, then I couldn't found any meaning in going on, and decided to quit. End of the story. I regret somehow, but even now I know that, I wouldn't be able to continue. It was hurting to much to even let me think about the map for a brief second.

After that it was easier to move to a different category, I wouldn't be qualified for overall anyways, so I choose a lot more simpler one. Which was kind of fun actually. Even though it was a lot more easier technically, and also a lot less demanding physically, I managed to make some quite funny mistake. I know no limits, when it comes to dreaming throughout the course.

I've my lesson taken;

1- It's ok to not to choose the hardest option you can take.

2- The stuff that you're thinking would be too easy, may actually not be.

3- Stop summarizing the course all along the race, you got plenty of time for that, after the race. (It's the reason for my mistakes almost 99% of the time.) 

What about JWOC 2012?

It's been over 2 years, since I've been in JWOC. Even though it's a long time, every time I think about it, my motivation drops, I feel like everything is falling apart, my heart is almost in pieces, and I'm feeling like I won't be able to breath once more. Some may think that I'm exaggerating, but I'm really not. I'm keeping all of my maps in files. I've been avoiding that part of the file for 2 years. I really do regret all of those races. It was a terrible part of my life. I don't know why it happened, or how, and with all of these experiences in hand, I still can't see how could I change it, when I just felt that it wasn't write. The last part was the part that pushed me to open up the file once more, check mistakes, see what went wrong, try to diagnose it. And I did it today. I've opened up the file once more, found split times from internet, checked the courses, checked my own route choices, tried to remember what went wrong, how did it felt like, what I was thinking. Most of my mistakes, I can still remember them, I can still see them in front of my eyes. I still don't have an answer for all that questions, but at least now I can actually visit them, to correct, to make sure they won't happen again, as I should do years ago.

A "sound" and everything starts all over again..

If you're a runner for some time, it's not that hard to tell, if the injury just knocked you down to the ground, is serious enough to make you tie in a bed for the following days -or maybe weeks-, or if it's something that would disappear in few minutes, after you get over with the shock of the moment.

Yesterday, in training, after I fell down, with a cracking sound from my ankle, I knew that it wasn't that kind of a pain, that would go away in minutes, since for the first time I wasn't able to explain what to do to my teammate, because of the tears that were running from my eyes to ears. Even now, I'm not exactly sure if I was crying out of pain or anger of such a stupid ignorance.

I was injured for over a month, from the same ankle, and poetically, with almost the same angle. And I knew that, running without a ankle bracelet is a risk that's not worth taking. But like every small silly girl, I did it anyway. Actually it was not just a one time thing, but I was running out of a bracelet for 1.5 weeks 'till then. I was a little cautious in a way, at least I was watching my steps, 'till I felt like I was ready to run without looking at the ground again, that's yesterday.

For the first time in months, I was trying to deal another performance related problem, other than my ankle. My ankle should have felt a bit jealous, because just at the point of the course, where I was feeling like the training is over, it was really over, for good. After that point, It was something like a off-road biathlon, including a 8.5 km trail run and a 2.5 km downhill mountain biking, with a single leg.

Under normal circumstances, I'm kind of a athlete that would appreciate a little more rest, but definitely it's the worst possible time for this kind of a rest. But a visit to the physician this morning, revealed the hard fact, no one is asking me. It's not a volunteered rest, but an obligatory one, once again. And this time, I'm under strong surveillance, since it's the second time in 2.5 months.

For now, and probably for the coming 2 weeks, I will be hoping to get better until O-Ringen, so that I can maybe jog or even walk along the courses, instead of just standing at the finish line and cheering for my teammates; and dreaming about the idea of having a proper training, without the idea of injury in my head; while my ankle wonders over a pillow.

So it's almost the same story I had 2.5 months ago, with just a small difference, this time I'm really tight on time.

A new season and internship; it's way more complicated than it sounds

Let me first tell you this; I have the best internship I can possibly find in Turkey. That's a good news for my academic career, and let me add one more thing; I'm pretty happy about this opportunity. Also, I'm more ambitious to keep my training going then ever, I mean, I have my dreams (aims maybe?) in head, and I'm reluctant to make them happen. And that's where things get a little bit complicated.

I've been working for 1.5 weeks for now, and my training program is already a mass. I'm not able to find the balance between internship and training. I'm leaving home so early that, I can barely even have a breakfast, and coming so tired, that sometimes I'm not able to get myself off the couch, and fall asleep. But things have to change. It cannot go on like that, obviously.

The first solution that came to my head is, to wake up a bit earlier -like 1 hour earlier- have my training done before leaving for internship, with a rested body, and also a willing mind. First things first. Will try this for the following 2 weeks. I hope that it will work, otherwise, I have to find another way around.


Bonus Content :)

I've just finished reading a book; Life Without Limits, by Chrissie Wellington. It's really an inspirational one. I can heart-fully recommend it to anyone that has doubts about whether they can reach to where they dream. It's also one of the most honest biographies that I've ever red. She's all out there, with all the ups and downs of both an athletic and an academic one, in separate time frames.

I'm taking the book with me wherever I go, first reason is; It keeps reminding me that, anything is possible, if I'm ready and willing to work for it; and another reason; it's a present from someone that's really special for me, and keeps taking my pieces together and get me going every time I fall. Everybody needs that someone in their lives.

Summary Style Update

I've just realized that, I haven't been writing anything since November, while so much things were going on with my life. I won't be writing everything in detail, but I will made a list of important things that have happened since then (as far as I can remember.) And from now on, I will try to be more consistent with my blog, hopefully.

• First medal at elite class (2nd National Race of the year. Didn't expect it, since it was a sprint)
• National Team Selection Physical Test (Which I did pretty well)
• National Team Camp (Which I ruined completely)
• World Cup (Organization Team)
• Antalya O-Days (Another sprint medal ??)
• Hashimoto Diagnosis (I've been having treatment since)
• Decision to work with a professional for nutrition. (Especially weight control to be honest)
• Cappadocia O-Cup (I really don't have any opinions about it, since I can't remember it that well.)
• Ankle Sprain (No running training since. :/ )
• METU Trail Run (Organization)
• Turkey Champs. (I didn't started on 1st day, I've walked the whole course on second day)

I'm swimming and making some strength training since the injury. And will continue to do that until it's recovered enough to let me run. My only hope for now is to be able to get my ankle back 'till the Turkish Univ. Champs (which is 17 days ahead). Fingers crossed..